A Question for all the Mothers out there...
A question for all the mothers out there…
Hands up if you’ve felt guilty about taking any time out for yourself?
When you think about it, it’s kind of strange that we feel this way. Before we had children there was no issue going to the shops, doing exercise or having a coffee with friends.
So why now, as mothers, do we hop on the guilty train when we choose do those things?
For some, the guilty feeling is so strong that they actually choose not to pursue any activity that will benefit their own well being.
Consider this scenario – hubby heads out with the mates and says ‘see you later’ and leaves.
When it’s our turn to let our hair down and head out with the girls, we say ‘I’m heading out, I’ve fed the kids, your dinner is in the oven.
Make sure they have a bath, their pajamas are laid out on the bed and they’ll need a bedtime story before lights out at 7:30 and no later.
Don’t forget to feed the dog and make the kids’ lunches for tomorrow, there’s a reminder note on the bench.
Call me if there’s any problems. Bye honey’! and off we go hesitantly, hoping it will all go smoothly for him so you can enjoy your night.
Can you see what’s happening here? It’s the arrival of the guilty train. Climb on board. You’ve sold yourself a ticket.
For some reason, a little voice inside of us makes us feel bad for even going out with the girls! This little voice that sets off our guilt gets so loud that we just give up and go back to being a wife and mother.
We feel we are being selfish, that we don’t deserve to have fun, that we are letting down our loved ones.
Is this why some of us turn to self destructive habits like eating foods that aren’t what the body needs, smoking, drinking and not keeping the body moving? We feel trapped being everything to everyone else.
Ok, are you ready to hear this? I’m going to tell you it’s OK for you to give yourself some alone time, time to exercise, or have time to spend with your friends.
You are human correct? You have the right to be happy, to nurture your wellbeing with good food and exercise, to look after yourself.
No one else is going to do it for you, it’s up to you.
It’s hard to get over this guilty feeling but maybe you can challenge the little voice inside your head and tell it that right now you need support and not to feel guilty, or selfish, about your choices.
Schedule a night out with the girls. Make exercise part of your daily life. Have a bath. Read a book or a magazine.
Nurture your mental and physical wellbeing so you can be there for your husband and kids, so you can feel strong and healthy. Go and live your best life, you’re worth it!
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